Thursday, October 1, 2009

Roman Polanski is a kiddy fucker and Hollywood is down with that...

"My Penis isn't much bigger than this, so what's the big deal?" Roman asks the police before they apprehend him for ass-fucking a thirteen year old girl.

Oh, Hollywood. You get even more twisted and depraved by the day despite all your self-righteous causes and all the African babies you adopt. It saddens me to no end to see some of my most beloved film-makers supporting this kiddy-fucker. It really makes me wonder what kind of kiddy fucking they're all getting themselves into in their spare time. I mean, how do you defend a kiddy ass fucking, dirty old man, who to top it off is too much of a coward to take responsibility for what he did, so in-turn he high-tales is to the land of kiddy-fuckers? Wait, by Hollywood's logic he did take responsibility by paying off the little girl he raped. Whoops, I forgot-throwing money at things makes everything right, and inturn all our troubles go away not only in Hollywood, but America in general.

Oh, wait. I get it! He's a great artist, which automatically relieves him of the sin of being a total piece of shit and a poor excuse for a human being.

Ugh, where's Travis Bickle when you need him?

I think I'm going to use all my Martin Scorcsese films for target practice for supporting Roman "Kiddy Fucker" Polanski.

Martin Scorcese and Tilda Swinton said something to the likes of "this sets a dangerous precedent". What? You mean the dangerous precedent of bringing dirty old men that enjoy drugging and ass-fucking thirteen year old girls in the ass to justice? I guess, Tilda is afraid that the 13 year-old girl she's ass fucking with her ice-princess strap-on might come after her soon. And Marin, I'm not sure if you have a 13 year old daughter, but if you do would you mind me coming over and fucking her in the ass? I mean, I have this really great book which I'm getting close to selling, which would make it okay, right? I promise, I'll let you direct it when they sell the movie rights.

Shit, this country/world is fucked. And don't tell me the recession is over. What a load of crap. The "experts" seem to have forgotten one major thing about all the recoveries of the past-they occurred in line with job creation. If this is a truly a recovery than it will truly be ground breaking because it will be a "jobless recovery", which basically means the rich get richer, the poor get poorer, and everyone in between gets fucked in the ass by dream-fuckers like Roman Polanski.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

The "Revolution" in Iran

REVOLUTION! YEAH! Yeah, right...

According to the Washington post "thousands" of protesters hit the streets today in Tehran. For some odd reason Reuters reported about 250 people showed up. Regardless of the descrepancy in numbers that's a lot of people in a city of 12 million!

Revoluti... Oh shit, I'm a rich Iranian kid who has an interview at Oxford and Berkeley next semester! I better get done setting this trashcan on fire quick -- and thus freeing my country -- so I can get home before dinner. I have to be well-rested and well-fed in order to make an informed decision about what Western country I will move to, so I can bitch and moan about how awful the West is instead of standing and fighting (getting shot in the head or tortured by my self-righteous, megalomanic countrymen).

Dream on...twitter.

A disturbing course of events on X-Box live

So, I was playing BomberMan live on X-box live. Of course, it was chalked full of shit-talking, illiterate pre-teens and teenagers whose favorite words are: faggot, homo, gay, nigger, bitch, cunt, loser, bitch, fuck, shit, and basically any other awesome word you can think of within the lexicon of vocabulary that makes up the bright future of America. Of course, I play anyways, especially when I'm drunk (like now). However, I usually just turn their voices on mute, but this time I didn't for some odd reason (maybe b/c I was drunk).

Anyways, these two punk asses were dropping the most "f", "n" and "gay-faggot" bombs I've ever heard in my life. I figured they were just some punk-asses because their voices were about as deep as twelve year olds. Well, to make a long story short one of them had their web-cam on and was broadcasting to the world his awesomeness. It turns out that he was a teenage father playing "Bomberman" with his four year old kid. I swear to the Lord almighty that the father couldn't have been more than seventeen years old. And to top it off he was teaching his kid to talk as much awesome shit as he. Awe, like father like son. And the government wants me to pay for dip-shits like these health-insurance? Fuck, we're screwed.

Oh, and Massauchausets is not a good model for universal health insurance. It's one of the most affluent, highly educated states in the Union and it barely works. There's no way that it would work in say, Mississipi or California where half the population is a bunch of lazy, uneducated, fat-asses on welfare. But that's just my opinion, and my opinion doesn't really matter because I don't tell people what they want to hear. I tell them the truth. And the truth of the matter is I need another drink.

One more hard truth: it's a scientific fact that Americans are getting fatter, lazier, stupider, and more full-of-shit by the nanosecond. So, how does that translate to the economy rebounding on rocket-boosters? Or us maintaining the proverbial #1 label? I have no fucking clue, but then again I work at Safeway. But like the training video said: "We're simply the best!" I'm almost drunk enough to believe it right about now.

I'm lovin' it!

All these politicians taking "100%" responsibility! After they get caught, of course!

Thanks, Sen. John Ensign of Nevada. That was really big of you owning up to your extra-marital affair after you got caught.

I wonder how many percent of responsibility these politicians would have taken if they would have gotten away with it? Hmmmmm...just a wild guess, but maybe zero?!

God bless, America. We take hypocrisy to a whole other level.

So, Obama, when are we going to borrow some more money from China for another social welfare stimulus plan while looking the other way as they tred all over the human right's of their own citizens? Hopefully, soon b/c my job at baggin' it up at Safeway just isn't cutting it. Livin' the dream, baby. Livin' the dream.

Tuesday, June 30, 2009


I'm flip-flopping back to my original stance-keep our money and our troops out of their mess.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Iran Election Violence is "outrageous," Obama says

What's outrageous is Obama's audacity to believe that if he keeps spouting big words like "outrageous" and "appalled" that they'll actually stop.

Obama is naive as hell, and is learning a hard lesson in human behavior:

How do you engage a bully? Do you reason with him? Do you appeal to his compassionate side?

No, bullies don't have compassionate sides for the simple fact that if they did, they wouldn't be bullies. In addition, you can't negotiate with power hungry nut-jobs with megalomaniacal superiority complexes, which you are presently learning the hard way (I hope). The sad truth is that at some point you're going to have to show these bastards (Kim too) that you're willing to put your words into action. Otherwise, they won't take any of your empty threats seriously, and will continue trampling all over the human rights of their own citizens as well anyone else in the world they can get their raptor claws on.

The raptors of the world only understand one thing. So, do the right thing, Obama. Be a leader and take the initiative. You've already given them a chance and they spit their raptor bile in your face on numerous occasions, and will continue to do so unless you teach them a lesson. Teach them a lesson: put that big, black foot of yours in their ass! That's the only negotiating tool they'll take seriously!

If you don't the democratic Iranians will eventually give up. History shows us that anytime a small, ruthless group of individuals are willing to use extreme force against a large group of people who aren't willing or able to match that force will eventually give up or be suppressed to the point of impotence. Just ask the Germans during the Nazi Era. People forget that the Nazi's only represented about 30% of the population. The hard-line Iranians represent much more than that, and they have complete control over the economy. Unless you help them this golden opportunity to liberate Iran will pass.

Anyways, I hope this lesson in history and human nature hits home to all you foolish bumper sticker activists driving around with your: "They Don't Hate our freedom, they hate our policies" bumper stickers. You're right, they do hate our policies, and two of our primary policies are free-speech and the right to protest peacefully. Oh, and one our most treasured policies is freedom. I bet you're all so "appalled". Well, guess what: no matter how much reason or compassion you show them the Ayatollah and his thugs don't give shit what you think, and would cut your fucking stupid heads off and kill your children if given the chance.


Friday, June 19, 2009